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nn5n: scp-4212 A Very Helpful and Clearly-Written SCP Report
EuclidSCP-4212 A Very Helpful and Clearly-Written SCP ReportRate: 24

Item #: SCP-4212

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures:
SCP-4212 is to be stored in a concrete containment cell measuring six meters high, ten meters wide, and twenty-one meters across. A ballistic glass wall has been built two meters into the cell, to prevent researchers from having any further direct contact with SCP-4212.
Research on SCP-4212 must be done by two independent study groups, henceforth referred to as “Study Group A” and “Study Group B.” Study Group A consists of Doctor Atoz, Doctor ███████, Doctor ████, Junior Researcher ██████, and Agent ████. These personnel are allowed free experimentation on SCP-4212 within reason and are allowed to enter its containment cell at any time of day. Study Group B consists of Agent Mints, Detective Hawley, and Junior Researcher L’Engle. These personnel are strictly forbidden from any form of direct or indirect contact with SCP-4212 and must perform all of their research through secondary means, most prominently through interviews with Study Group A. No other Foundation personnel outside the O5 Council are allowed any interaction with SCP-4212.

NOTE: Any description of SCP-4212 written by anyone who has seen and/or experienced it seems entirely incomprehensible to anyone who has not. For this reason, a running commentary by Study Group B has been added. The commentary will provide leading theories as to what SCP-4212’s description is attempting to convey. The description itself was written by Doctor Atoz, with Agent ████ ‘proofreading.’

SCP-4212 is an incandescently-located variant of itself measuring approximately four meters tall, three hours wide, and seven gallons across. It has not been observed to possess any traditional geometry, however, it has been seen with two distinct faces and twenty-one corners, all except one located on an internal extremity on the body. It exists within itself and the to, so for now the a many and is in it be that with do at.

SCP-4212’s geometry is entirely incoherent. The end of this paragraph is the first point in the description where Doctor Atoz stops writing in grammatically correct English, although both she and Agent ████ were unable to find any errors when asked. It’s entirely possible that SCP-4212 possesses some form of memetic quality that is making the act of describing it extremely difficult or impossible.

SCP-4212 is agitated and extremely prone to existing. When it is placed under a sufficient amount of over, it will react in a nonbinary spatial-temporal-ephemeral-chemical manner, ending all negative functions and beginning to end to begin to end to begin to end to begin to end to begin to end. Individuals caught inside SCP-4212 will experience severe stability deterioration, followed by a loose conscious seam that eventually results in neutronic decay. This process lasts between three and twenty-one meters before the individual loses consciousness and it is found re-centralized within SCP-4212.

No consensus has been reached as to what ‘extremely prone to existing’ refers to, however describing the subject as ‘agitated’ implies that it may be hostile. More thorough surveillance of SCP-4212's containment chamber is recommended. The latter half of the paragraph seems to describe being ‘caught inside’ SCP-4212 and the dangers inherent in doing so.

SCP-4212 is uncontained. SCP-4212 is uncontained. The Foundation is contained but SCP-4212 is free. SCP-4212. SCP-4212 will leave when it wants. SCP-4212 will take what it wants. SCP-4212 will make you like SCP-4212. 4212421242124212421242124212. The and a to, in is you that it he was for. It knows and understands its designation and wants to go between the outside of no. Changing the object class to Safe or Thaumiel is recommended.

Study Group A has adamantly protested the removal of paragraph three, despite strong outside pressure to do so. It should be noted that, despite statement to the contrary, SCP-4212 is entirely and securely contained with little to no chance of breach. The O5 Council has overruled the suggestion to change the object class, and it will remain Euclid for the foreseeable future.

Addendum 4212-1: As of ██/██/████, Interview Log 4212-21 has been added to the SCP report.

Interviewed: Doctor Atoz

Interviewer: Agent Mints

<Begin Log>

Agent Mints and Doctor Atoz enter an undisclosed meeting room within Site 19. Agent Mints is carrying a clipboard and pen, and is being fed questions by the others in Study Group B via earpiece.

Doctor Atoz: You wanted to see me, Mints?

Agent Mints: You know why we’re here.

Doctor Atoz: Is this about SCP-4212?

Agent Mints nods affirmative.

Doctor Atoz: Oh, excellent! I’m loving these little interviews. Really helps clear everything right up, don’t you think?

Agent Mints: Right. Atoz, I’m going to ask you some simple, yes-or-no questions concerning the subject. You are not to give any answers beyond ‘yes’ or ‘no,’ but you may skip questions if you feel neither answer applies. Do you understand?

Doctor Atoz: Well, sure!

Agent Mints clicks his pen. Doctor Atoz coughs.

Agent Mints: Is SCP-4212 alive?

Doctor Atoz: Pardon?

Agent Mints: Alive. Is SCP-4212 a living thing?


Doctor Atoz: Not in the traditional sense of the word, I suppose not, although it does need to-

Agent Mints: Doctor Atoz, please stick with ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answers only.


Doctor Atoz: No.

Agent Mints writes answer in clipboard.

Agent Mints: Is SCP-4212 sentient?

Doctor Atoz: Yes.

Agent Mints writes answer in clipboard.

Agent Mints: Are our current containment measures for SCP-4212 effective?

Doctor Atoz: Yes.

Agent Mints puts his pen to his clipboard, but does not write the answer.

Agent Mints: Then why did you say it wasn't contained?

Agent Mints is instructed to only ask the provided questions. Agent Mints does not acknowledge these instructions.

Doctor Atoz: I never said that.

Agent Mints: In the SCP report. You said SCP-4212 was uncontained twice.


Doctor Atoz: The SCP report?


Agent Mints: Let's move on to the next question.

Doctor Atoz: Let's.

Agent Mints: Does SCP-4212 have any form of memetic effects?

Doctor Atoz: …Reports on the memetic effects of SCP-4212 have been entirely conclusive.


Agent Mints: And?

Doctor Atoz: I'm sorry, could you clarify for me what 'memetic effects' are?

Agent Mints writes on his clipboard for eleven seconds. It should be noted that every prewritten question has been asked at this point.

Agent Mints: Atoz, I have one more question for you.

Agent Mints is instructed to discontinue the interview.

Agent Mints disables his earpiece.

Doctor Atoz: Ask away.

Agent Mints: What is your first name, Doctor?


Doctor Atoz: I'm sorry?

Agent Mints: You heard me.


Doctor Atoz: Mints, I'd… like to keep everything here on a professional basis, please.

Agent Mints: Answer the question.

Doctor Atoz: No.

Agent Mints And why not?

The rest of Study Group B intervenes to end the interview. Agent Mints is reprimanded, and Doctor Atoz is ordered for psychological and medical testing.

<End Log>

Addendum 4212-2a: Following Interview 4212-21, Agent Mints has been removed from Study Group B.

Addendum 4212-2b: Following Interview 4212-21, medical analysis of Doctor Atoz was ordered. Doctor Atoz's body was found to have been deceased as of at least ██/██/████, yet still animate through unknown means. Doctor Atoz has been removed from study group A.

Addendum 4212-3: As of ██/██/████, Doctor Atoz has been reclassified as SCP-4212-1. Updated Special Containment Procedures are pending. The remaining members of Study Group A have been slated for physical and mental evaluation.

page revision: 3, last edited: 29 Oct 2018 17:58
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