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nn5n: scp-3304 That Time the Foundation Froze Hell
EuclidSCP-3304 That Time the Foundation Froze HellRate: 38

A closeup view of SCP-3304.

Item #: SCP-3304

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: The facility containing SCP-3304 has been occupied by Foundation personnel, and no unauthorized access to the object is permitted. No manned or unmanned exploration of SCP-3304 is to be attempted at this time. At its own request, SCP-3304-2 is to be contained in a standard humanoid containment cell in Site-19.

As testing has found the energy produced by SCP-3304-1 to be non-anomalous, its continued operation has been authorized. It has been linked directly to the Foundation's midwest and Atlantic power grids, and has resulted in a ███% increase in the grid's energy efficiency while reducing costs by ██%. A proposal to use SCP-3304 as the power source of a new global Foundation power grid is currently under consideration.

ADDENDUM 10/21/2017: Following incident 3304-A, SCP-3304-1 has been disassembled and no attempts to reconstruct it are to be made. In addition, the following items are to be inserted into SCP-3304 once per month for the following ten years: 20 liters of virgin blood, 666 liters of heating oil, 2 metric tons of raw pine timber, and one live D-class known to have broken at least 7 of the traditional Judeo-Christian Ten Commandments.

Description: SCP-3304 is a class 2 inter-dimensional aperture located in █████████, West Virginia. The portal appears visually as a wall of flames that occasionally shifts into images or patterns described as disturbing by viewers, and it is approximately 2 meters tall and 1 meter wide. Personnel and material that enter SCP-3304 are considered lost; no signal is received from unmanned exploratory drones and no D-class have returned from exploration attempts. Evacuation cables are severed at the point of entry without exception.

Connected to SCP-3304 is SCP-3304-1, an advanced geothermal energy generator that utilizes anomalous properties to increase the speed and efficiency of its output. The generator's main pylon has been inserted into SCP-3304, and the aperture serves as a seemingly limitless supply of easily accessible geothermal power.

The facility in which these objects are located was formerly the headquarters of Gehenna Geothermal Energy, a 2008 startup that rapidly became West Virginia's primary provider of electricity. The Foundation discovered its anomalous properties in 2010 after the company's rapid expansion achieved regional media attention. Given the perceived lack of viable geothermal energy production in West Virginia, the company was flagged by Foundation media monitoring. A standard investigation quickly revealed the facility's anomalous source, and SCP-3304-2 surrendered into Foundation custody without incident.

SCP-3304-2 is Earl Raum, the owner, operator, and sole employee of Gehenna Geothermal Energy. SCP-3304-2 is the physical manifestation of a demonic entity. The entity's true form is that of a 3 meter long organism resembling the species Corvus albus.1 However, SCP-3304 prefers to maintain human form under normal circumstances.


Prepared by the Department of External Affairs- Interrogation and Negotiation Division

Subject: Interview Log SCP-3304-2

Involved Agents: Level 3 Agent Lyle Dietz

Report: The following interview was conducted without incident 3 days following the apprehension of SCP-3304-2. A transcript is provided:

Dietz: Alright Mr. Raum, I'm here to ask you a few questions regarding Gehenna Geothermal. We know by now that you're actually a demon. Cooperate with us and we'll dispel you from this dimension rather than keeping you prisoner.

SCP-3304-2: What? No please don't! I mean, uh, I don't mind it here it's uh-

Dietz: Spit it out.

SCP-3304-2: Please don't send me back! At this point the big man will definitely know what I've been up to and my feathers still hurt from the last time he had my cousins flay me for stealing. 400 fucking years and it still itches. Is that fair? It ain't fair right? Right.

Dietz: In that case your continued housing can be arranged. Do you accept these terms?

SCP-3304-2: Heaven yeah man! I'm your bird, bro. Ask away.

Dietz: Are you responsible for the creation of the portal, and if so, what was your goal in doing so?

SCP-3304-2: Yeah, yeah man that was me. Look you know how it is, us mid-level folks gotta roll with the big dogs, pay taxes, feed and equip thirty legions of demon warriors. That shit is expensive man, and those new fuckers on the block totally cost me my job. I opened the portal and started the plant to make some scratch on the side, you feel me?

Dietz: Why West Virginia?

SCP-3304-2: I didn't pick it specifically man, it was just the closest place geographically y'know?

Dietz: Who are you referring to when you mentioned the newcomers earlier? What exactly was your job?

SCP-3304-2: Fuckin Lehman Brothers man. Soon as it showed up it became the biggest player in town, how's a Bird gonna compete with that? I'm the lord of thieves but the big banks? Shit man that's a godblessed industry my guy.

Dietz: I'm confused… Lehman Brothers was a human bank, it doesn't have a soul. How exactly did it show up in-

SCP-3304-2: Hey man talk like that is offensive! Ain't you been watchin' the news bro? Supreme Court says corporations are people too now, they got afterlife rights and shit.

Dietz: What are you talking about? The Court hasn't made any such ruling.

SCP-3304-2: Oh shit, my bad. Citizens United doesn't happen until next week.

Dietz: Are you suggesting you're a precognitive?

SCP-3304-2: I sure am bro! You're talking to Raum, Earl of the 84th demesne of Hell, Lord of all Thieves, master of Crows, and-

Dietz: Yes, that's all well and good but… you did all this to make money right? If you can see the future, why bother with the thermal plant? You could have just bought a winning lottery ticket or bet on a horse race or something.

SCP-3304-2: … Oh God fucking bless it.


Prepared by the Department of External Affairs- Interrogation and Negotiation Division

Subject: Incident Report 3304-A

Involved Agents: Level 3 Agent Lyle Dietz

Report: On 10/██/2017, SCP-738 broke its pattern of activity, with SCP-738-2 repeatedly slamming into the door of its cell until researchers investigated. When a D-class was placed on the object, the entity claimed that it needed to speak with Foundation staff regarding Gehenna Geothermal Energy, and that time was of the essence. On-site staff agreed to the meeting, and Agent Dietz was assigned to represent the Foundation due to his prior experience with SCP-3304. During this incident, the entity took a form identical to Foundation chief legal counsel Sheldon Katz, esq.

Dietz: So, what exactly is this urgent business you've been talking about? I'm warning you upfront that any attempt to tempt either me or the personnel monitoring this interaction into one of your bargains will lead to the cessation of this meeting.

SCP-738: Of course. On behalf of my client, his unholiness Lucifer Beelzebub Satanael, M.D., I am contacting you regarding an urgent matter that is currently having a deleterious effect on both of our realms. In order to remedy this state of affairs, we have three requests. The first is the transference of Great Earl Raum into our custody.

Dietz: That can be arranged, depending on what you offer us in return. Frankly, he hasn't been very useful as a source of information or as a subject of research.

SCP-738: Naturally. The second and third requests are of far greater importance however. We require you to cease withdrawing energy from our realm, and to provide the following materials monthly for ten years in order to facilitate the replenishment of metaphysical heat.

A list denoting the materials previously mentioned in the containment procedures appears on the table, and it is promptly read by Dietz.

Dietz: Okay what kind of Hot Topic bullshit is this? I mean seriously, virgin blood and the number 666? This is ridiculous.

SCP-738: You're dealing with ideo-ontological concepts here! Honestly if either of us has the right to be incensed over the nature of these items it is I. You simian rubes just have to assign belief into absurd concepts and thus give said concepts power in the first place.

Dietz: In any case, you're asking for a lot. The materials are one thing, but the portal is now the source of a big chunk of our electricity. Its extraction is clearly harming your brethren, but why should we care? What's stopping us from siphoning your realm dry?

SCP-738: Ah mortals. So short sighted. The depletion of our realm affects your world as much as it does ours, you mewling ingrate. Haven't you noticed that unlikely phenomena are showing up at higher and higher rates recently? Feats of virtual impossibility are becoming more and more common, that business with the sneeze for example. The depletion of our realm's heat is eroding the fundamental bedrock upon which all probability rests, you must understand that!

Dietz: I'm… not sure I follow.

SCP-738: Hell is freezing over.

page revision: 7, last edited: 27 Oct 2017 11:20
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